Episode 386: Storm Force - The man who stole Polaris, parts 5-9

Episode 386: Storm Force: The man who stole Polaris, parts 5-9

Listen to the one-armed man with the sword telling you to shoot the zombie’s computer. He’s talking sense.

When you think about it, zombie hitman Alexander Kruise is just living the dream of every American. I mean, who hasn’t wanted to blow up the president with a nuclear bomb delivered in a shark-shaped, laser armed battle car? (Don’t answer that). And so, once again, it falls to our designated protagonists in Storm Force to save the day from his poorly defined evil plan to do something bad for some reason that really escapes us. So once again grab your razor disc, your exo-skeleton and your rocket propelled sheep scarers and be prepared to be shocked as Mikron actually does something in this gripping tale torn from the pages of Battle the inevitable grip of entropy!

Riffers: Rebecca Bartley, Natasha Isavia, Matt Simmons and Rick R. Mortis

Written by: Rick R.

Episode 385 - Old Knights, chapters 5-8

Episode 385: Old Knights, chapters 5-8

If only they hadn’t spent all their money on a superfluous Phoenix Hawk. Then they’d have the money to repair the superfluous Phoenix Hawk.

Upon discovering that one of your men is a traitor who was in league with pirates, there is only one logical course of action. That’s right, sit on the information and not tell anyone because it might cause a fuss. And if this plan seems sensible to you, then a senior position in Knight’s Knights Chevaliers is yours for the asking. In the meantime, the technical crew ignore dangerous unexploded ordinance for months at an end, the commander goes on a rage-fuelled bender because the woman he stalked then ignored is going out with somebody else and it’s revealed that the main qualification the unit’s staff possess is that they were all friends once. That’s right, it’s a festival of fun-filled self-destructive ineptitude at all levels in this the second portion of Old Knights.


Riffers: Dan, Rebecca Bartley, Tsuneo Tateo and Rick R. Mortis
Written by: Zogster and Rick R.

Episode 384 - Old Knights, chapters 1-4

Episode 384: Old Knights, chapters 1-4

Remember to pillage locally and support your local pirate organisation.

After five years of walking his giant war robot around the block and stalking the local doctor, retired designated protagonist Carter Knight goes back into the saddle one last time. And by that, we mean his former unit basically kidnapped him and forced him into the role, as they were too inept to do it themselves. Naturally he unquestionably accepts having this role thrust upon himself and immediately rewards their faith in him by injuring himself in highly unlikely ways. So thrill as the cast struggle to define themselves as individual people and pirates attack an elaborate underground base that apparently only exists for pirates to attack in the first portion of Old Knights, a fic by a guy called Knight about a unit called the Knights. You might notice a pattern there.

Riffers: Dan, Rebecca Bartley, Tsuneo Tateo and Rick R. Mortis
Written by: Zogster and Rick R.`

Rebuild of Elmer Studios, year seven

In reaching the end of our seventh year of the Rebuild of Elmer Studios, we passed another important milestone. At this stage we have outlasted our original incarnation in terms of lifespan, even if we also passed the first incarnation’s episode count some time before that. (Some disclaimers apply). And at this stage, we have enough material to likely see us through our eighth year as well.

This year we produced a total of twenty-two episodes. While I would like to say that it was a slow year, the truth is that it’s become the new standard. I did try to set a goal of two new episodes per month, but the simple fact is that real life is more important. However, I feel that this year we were truly blessed with an exceptional crop of fics (even accounting for the last part of Coalition War Story, which was a holdover from the previous year). There was nothing that was truly bad or awful, and instead what we had was entertaining in its own right.

Episode 383 - Transformers Earth's Mightiest Heroes, chapters 16-19

Episode 383: Transformers Earth's Mightiest Heroes, chapters 16-19

Derek’s main role here seems to be “Wikipedia.”

The tension ramps up as forces that include superhumans, gods and alien robots clash in an epic battle for control of one abandoned school in Iowa. Will Derek’s beloved childhood memories survive? Can Derek spend more time expositing at Captain America? Will Black Widow get out of the funk she’s been in since Derek got lightly hurt? Will Hawkeye actually ever do anything? And are there any actual Transformers in this Transformers/Avengers crossover? You may well ponder these questions (well, you probably won’t) but fear not, for the fic won’t give you any sort of answer and instead just gives up the will to live. Throw in ‘sad Loki in prison’ scene #4,691, a completely stupid plot twist and a bit more about Derek (of course!) and you’ll be finally done with Transformers Earth’s Mightiest Heroes!

Riffers: Dan, Rebecca Bartley, Tsuneo Tateo and Rick R. Mortis
Written by: Zogster and Rick R.`

Episode 382 - Transformers Earth's Mightiest Heroes, chapters 11-15

Episode 382: Transformers Earth's Mightiest Heroes, chapters 11-15

It’s like if a Bill Bryson travelogue accidentally crashed into an action movie.

Have you ever found yourself needing to know the layout of an abandoned high school in the middle of Iowa? Well fret not, because Derek is here to save your one very specific problem! What does he do besides having that one talent that is largely redundant in the modern age of instantly available information? Very little. But everyone seems to make him the centre of attention anyway, so clearly there’s something important about him. It’s almost like he’s the author’s OC or something. Meanwhile in non-Derek related matters, people get off planes, park cars and drive slowly across the countryside! So strap in for the third part of this wild, thrill-a-minute ride! (Plus there’s the outside chance that there might be some giant alien shapechanging robots).


Riffers: Dan, Rebecca Bartley, Tsuneo Tateo and Rick R. Mortis
Written by: Zogster and Rick R.`

Episode 381 - Transformers Earth's Mightiest Heroes, chapters 6-10

Episode 381: Transformers Earth's Mightiest Heroes, chapters 6-10

Rhodes and Epps work under so many levels of operational secrecy that they have to get presidential clearance to go to each others’ birthday parties.

Gigantic shape-changing alien robots at war for millions of years! Beings with powers far beyond those of mere mortals who fight to protect the earth! Together, these two groups will attend meetings! Are you thrilled yet, because I know I am! That’s right, having spent half a dozen chapters introducing characters, we get to see them stand around and talk to each other, exposit their backstories and teleconference! I can tell you’re as excited as I am for these developments, but that’s not all that happens in this action-packed chunk of fic. We’re introduced to a new character who has a skill that will be vital to the action to come: he knows about one small town in Iowa! Are you excited, because I know I’m not!


Riffers: Dan, Rebecca Bartley, Tsuneo Tateo and Rick R. Mortis
Written by: Zogster and Rick R.`