Sunday, December 21, 2014

Episode 282 - Angels of Fury, part 1

Episode 282: Angels of Fury, part 1

Well there was a weighty and improbable origin story for you

From out of nowhere, a guest riffer appears bringing with them the gift of terrible role-play biographies! And what could be better than the quality origin stories of the Angels of Fury, an all-female group from Champions Online that is not made up entirely of men pretending to be women on the internets at all? Well, most things, really, but that won’t stop us anyway! Instead, we get to enjoy the fantastic origin stories of Doctor Dragon Kung Fu Cop Girl, Generic Robot Girl (with many backpacks), Time Travelling Space Girl (who can’t use punctuation properly), Creepy Japanese Schoolgirl and Idiot Daughter Who’s Married to Carol Danvers on the Astral Plane, um, Girl as they form a staggeringly inept group that stand for truth, justice and ERPing in Penthouse Hideouts. It’s so exciting, you’ll want to measure your estrogen levels!


Riffers: Rebecca Bartley, Damien Hawker, Kari Montero and Rick R. Mortis
Written by: KayEmm and Rick R.

Saturday, December 20, 2014

Episode 281 - Darth Hypnus - The Battle for Red Twilight and the Battle for Skyger Station

Episode 281: Darth Hypnus - The Battle for Red Twilight and the Battle for Skyger Station

It’s at about this point that Hypnus should begin to realize that his plan has many, many flaws in it. Deep, fundamental flaws that any idiot would have spotted by now

Exiled by the Dark Council, DARTH HYPNUS and his pet Rancor, MISTER FLUFFY, have travelled to the outer rim of the Galaxy where they have begun construction of a new battleship, the IDIOT PLOT FRACTAL. I mean, it makes no sense for them to do such out in the middle of nowhere with no resources or personnel or infrastructure or the like, and the ship is under the command of a failure stuck in a dead end career and Hypnus is a reclusive loner, but work with us here.

Now under the command of ADMIRAL RED TWILIGHT CAPTAIN, this massive battleship could turn the tide in the war against the Republic should it ever be completed. For, as unbeknownst to Darth Hypnus as he pulls into SKYGER STATION to get some GUM, a few CANS OF ENERGY DRINK and some GIRLY MAGS FEATURING TWI’LEK CHICKS, the Republic has sent a fleet of ships to end this menace.

Please join this role play and TAKE IT SERIOUSLY. Please.


Riffers: Dan, Rebecca Bartley, Tsuneo Tateo and Rick R. Mortis
Written by: Zogster and Rick R.

Friday, November 21, 2014

Episode 280 - Darth Hypnus - The Battle of Onderon and the Seed of Vengance

Episode 280: Darth Hypnus - The Battle of Onderon and the Seed of Vengance

What kind of universe is it when you can't trust the twisted eldritch agents of unspeakable evil?

A long time ago on an RP forum far, far away, the malevolent poster DARTH HYPNUS unleashed a terrible scourge of bad character profiles upon an unsuspecting universe. However, the daring and worryingly obsessive Jedi master FINLEY was able to smuggle out these sinister documents in the hope that they could be used to defeat the malevolent Sith Lord.

Realising what had happened, the Dark Lord dispatched DARTH MALCION, master of the Dark Arts and enemy of Harry Potter for this book, the allegedly handsome and charismatic SILFAR KATTARN and the malignant and sinister DARTH UNCLE to the planet ONDERON (Not OBERON, no matter what it says) in pursuit.

Now their ship, the DESPERATE OVERCOMPENSATION approaches the unsuspecting planet…


Riffers: Dan, Rebecca Bartley, Tsuneo Tateo and Rick R. Mortis
Written by: Zogster and Rick R.

Monday, November 10, 2014

November Update



As you’ve probably noticed, it’s been rather scant the last month. Unfortunately, it’s probably going to be rather scant for this month as well. Real Life has been super-pressuring us of late, and we’ve had a lot on our plates, which has very much slowed down the riffing process. As fun as it is, priorities suck and annoying things like work, projects and other commitments tend to get in the way (Boo!). Clearly, the world needs to be more Kevinesque and hand us things on a silver platter (And have everyone think we’re awesome after we casually endanger it)

…where was I?

However, there is some good news to come! This ‘dry patch’ is probably only going to be another couple of weeks, and then we’ll be back in the swing (or swang) of things. Episodes 280 and 281 are in progress (sloooooow progress) with 282 through 284 allready lined up. Plus we also have a special project in the works (Not John Barren level special, mind you) for the near future.

The other good news is that we have managed to (somewhat) replenish the Strategic Badfic Reserve, so there is no immediate shortage. However, as allways, donations are appreciated. Got a badfic that you think needs some mockery? Then feel free to throw it our way.

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Episode 279 - Midnight, chapters 2-3

Episode 279: Midnight, chapters 2-3

That Midnight! So weird and creepy and casually homicidal and all! What a laugh!

Despite her many claims, the word ‘villainous’ might not be the best choice to describe Midnight. Better ones might be ‘inane,’ ‘repetitive’, ‘annoying’ and ‘cheesy.’ It’s certainly what hard-bitten, grizzled, tough-as-nails psychiatrist Doctor Brain Brian Flowers is going to put on her evaluation before he recommends dosing her up to the eyeballs and throwing away the key. But that’s okay, because since Arkham Asylum’s a fun and interesting place where mentally ill serial killers are allowed to wander freely, socialize in the common areas and never once suffer the consequences of their actions, so Midnight’s free to bug the ever-living crap out of anyone who’s dumb enough to listen to her. Plus add in a situation which none of the six dozen members of the Bat-Family are able to deal with for no real reason and supervillain human resources, and you get something that might pass for a fanfic in bad light. It’s like Girl on Fire, only without the charm, wit, sophistication and loveable characters!


Riffers: Dan, Rebecca Bartley, Tsuneo Tateo and Rick R. Mortis
Written by: Zogster and Rick R.

Friday, October 3, 2014

Episode 278 - Storm Force, part 1

Episode 278: Storm Force, part 1

Somebody called Storm in a comic called Storm Force? What a pleasant coincidence!.

Ripped from the pages of Battle Storm Force (aka Battle Picture Weekly, Battle Picture Weekly and Valiant, Battle Action, Battle Action Force, Eagle with Battle and, sometimes, Larry) comes Action Storm Force, a totally original, not derivative in any way shape or for story of supertech secret agents fighting colourful snake spider themed bad guys! And what better way to start this gripping tale of intrigue and suspense then with ten pages of block exposition and backstory as our designated hero learns about how runways work and the shocking fact that recoil is a thing? I can’t think of anything. No really, I cannot think of a thing. This comic has taken away my ability to form rational thoughts. So instead, I’ll just blindly put my trust in the reclusive malformed subterranean genius. Nothing can go wrong with that at all.

Riffers: Rebecca Bartley, Natasha Isavia, Mat Simmons and Rick R. Mortis
Written by: Rick R.

Episode 277 - Girl on Fire, chapters 14-15

Episode 277: Girl on Fire, chapters 14-15

We'll be over here, not doing anything.


The Girl On Fire has been compared to the famous thought experiment, Xeno's Paradox (You know, the one with the turtle and the arrow that somehow does not end in a shish kebab). Much like Xeno's arrow, every time the plot seems to progress, no matter how marginally, the ending always seems that little bit further away. And much like any good thought experiment, the fic has no resemblance to reality. What it does have is the answers to many questions such as "What exactly is 'the most oil companies' anyway," "Will Ghost Flame ever be an actual threat" and "Can Stephanie save everyone who's been easily rendered helpless on her own?" Actually, if you need that one answered, then the turtle is further away than we thought.

Riffers: Dan, Maya Gold, Celena Harte and Tsuneo Tateo
Written by: Zogster