Monday, September 15, 2014

Rebuilding Elmer Studios - The Voice

When we were rebuilding the cast in preparation for the Rebuild of Delta, there was one incredibly important matter that had to be considered - who would it be that was sending them the fic? Almost immediately the answer came as a "rebooted" version of the original Elmer Studios host, The Voice. However, that then raised a lot of other questions, many of which had been around since the original series.

The result was that while a very literal off-screen character, the Voice would need a lot of work.

Episode 275 - Bubblegum Climax: Freefall, chapter 2

Episode 275: Bubblegum Climax: Freefall, chapter 2

Yes, I am glad that such an improbable development was properly foreshadowed rather than being thrown in at the last minute.

A convincing, deep and well-realised villain with well thought-out motives and goals can be an incredible asset to a narrative. I only mention this because the second half of Bubblegum Climax: Freefall doesn’t feature anything remotely like that. Instead it gives us Demond, a goony, one-dimensional clod who has no motivation, no background and no plan beyond ‘blow stuff up with the nuke I have for no real reason’ and goes out of his way to ruin his own operation and generally make things hard on himself. But he’s also incredibly fun, so we’ll let him do it anyway. Throw in a rampaging secret weapon that’s doing more harm to its master than anything else and a Deus Ex Machina that will shock you with just how forced it is, and you can call it a day. Save for the inevitable sequel, of course.

Riffers: Dan, Rebecca Bartley, Tsuneo Tateo and Rick R. Mortis
Written by: Zogster and Rick R.

Wednesday, September 3, 2014

Episode 274 - Bubblegum Climax: Freefall, chapter 1

Episode 274: Bubblegum Climax: Freefall, chapter 1

Leaping to conclusions, the fanfic!

Despite its title, this fic is not actually a lemon. Yes, I was actually surprised as well. What is it then? Mostly it’s a Bubblegum Crisis sequel fic that actually acknowledges the existence of Crash! and could be best summarised as “Knight Sabers In Space, kinda sorta maybe”. Being honest, for the most part it’s about a black jumpsuit that is both enigmatic and strangely fascinating, and certainly a lot more interesting than the person wearing it. It’s also about restating the obvious, exposition news, flubbed lines and airport waiting lounges, so if you are fans of any of those, you’re in for a treat. So sit back, relax, fall in love with a dead robot and enjoy the thing that is Bubblegum Climax: Not a Porno Set-Up, No Really.

Riffers: Dan, Rebecca Bartley, Tsuneo Tateo and Rick R. Mortis
Written by: Zogster and Rick R.

Friday, August 15, 2014

Episode 273 - Ravage Three Bodies Evolution

Episode 273: Ravage Three Bodies Evolution

Meanwhile, on the invisible planet of the floating head aliens.

From the depths of the murky past  comes what could be charitably described as a fanfic (And could be uncharitably described as many other things) about one being’s struggle against fate, destiny, manipulation by powers far beyond his comprehension and his tendency to explode a lot. Born out of a desire to describe different toys and how they relate to each other, Ravage Three Bodies Evolution is a metaphysical tour de force as can only be described by saying the phrase ‘just then’ over and over again, and has to be experienced to be believed (Largely because you won’t believe that something can be this bad). So join us and the cosmic alien space gods, pull up your favourite shelf-warming filler figure and watch as space and time are torn asunder! It’s like having a head injury, only in text!

Riffers: Rebecca Bartley, Natasha Isavia, Mat Simmons and Rick R. Mortis
Written by: Rick R.

Monday, August 11, 2014

Episode 272 - Foster's Arc - The Solaris Jokers

Episode 272: Foster's Arc - The Solaris Jokers

The explosion had caused him to explode. Who knew.

Tired of bad fanfics based on your favorite anime, comic book or even action figure franchise? How about something different, being the prelude to a fanfic based on a tabletop wargame (with an optional role-playing add-on)? If that idea doesn’t immediately repel you and send you screaming in panic, you may yet be ready for the confusingly titled Foster’s Arc – The Solaris Jokers. It’s your basic tale of one guy (called Foster, strangely enough) and the mountains of carnage and dead bodies that he leaves in his wake in the name of establishing a backstory and an explanation as to why he’s a burned-out alcoholic bum and yet eminently desirable by potential employers. Add in a cast of one-dimensional prop characters (Titan, That Guy and the most awkwardly-named mercenary ever) and then stop the fic before it begins, and you’re ready to go. Or not, as the case may be.

Riffers: Dan, Rebecca Bartley, Tsuneo Tateo and Rick R. Mortis
Written by: Zogster and Rick R.

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Episode 271 - Waiting in the Rain

Episode 271: Waiting in the Rain

Sure, they may be dangerous high-tech terrorists, but they do have fun.

Who is Hero and why is the entire GI Joe team utterly fascinated by her every single action to the point of excluding everything else? Well, if you’re looking for an answer, then you came to the wrong place. However, if you are looking for coffee, ninjas, flash floods and the thrilling revelation that eyes come in different colours (I know, I was shocked too!) then Waiting in the Rain is the non-linear sequence of words for you! As Cobra Commander unleashes his evil plan to use a thing to do a thing (No, it doesn't get any clearer then that) it’s up to our hero, um, Hero, to save the day, balance apples and be a walking enigma that sucks in all around it much like a bipedal black hole, leaving innumerable questions unanswered. Key among them being what exactly it is that you feed a bobcat anyway.

Riffers: Dan, Rebecca Bartley, Tsuneo Tateo and Rick R. Mortis
Written by: Zogster and Rick R.

Sunday, July 20, 2014

Episode 270 - Lena Frost Wagner, Astonishing X-Men

Episode 270: Lena Frost Wagner, Astonishing X-Men

Suddenly, without warning, another scene breaks out.

In the world of Lena Frost Wagner, Astonishing X-Men*, not all is as it seems. Actually, we're not sure how things are meant to be. Certainly, the fic isn't going to let us in on anything. All we can piece together is that Nightcrawler and the White Queen have a daughter (and possibly a son) who's attending the Jean Grey School for Higher Learning, where she's majoring in drama and crying. Apparently she's friends with random mutants, might or might not be a telepath and kinda sorta has three clone half-sisters and an alien bug thing for a boyfriend. Also there's a box from another universe, the Phoenix (maybe), the danger room, a highly confused Sentinel, the United Kingdom (it exists), possibly a group of Exiles and, oh yeah, everyone you know and love is dead. I think. I'm not sure. If you can understand what's going on here, good luck to you, because you're doing better than the fic is.

*Yes, that's the actual title.

Riffers: Dan, Maya Gold, Celena Harte and Tsuneo Tateo
Written by: Zogster